Tuesday, 20 March 2012

Career vs Full-Time Mum - Why the Controversy?

It's barely been a week since I announced to the world that I was pregnant, yet I've already stumbled across more than a few hurdles. But these hurdles have nothing to do with my husband, nor I. Instead, they've come from other women.

Yep, just a few hours after I told people I was expecting, I started to receive the sneering looks, the snide comments and the inappropriate questions.

Why? Well, it's simple, really. It all hinges on the fact that I don't plan on having a full-time job. Ridiculous, right? Yet despite the so-called choice we women are supposed to have in this day and age, I've endured numerous conversations which go something like this:

"So...you're going to be a mum? Full-time?"


"Full-time? Are you sure?"


"Isn't that a little bit lazy?"

"Well, no, not really...I'm pretty sure being a mum is more than full-time."

"But what was the point in you going to University? Or getting a decent job?"

OK, so I think this is enough to wind any woman up. But what I don't get is WHY? Why judge me - and so many others - for the decision we have made? Why even feel the need to pass comment on it?

Before you get the wrong idea, I'm not judging women for jumping back into a career after having children either. I think it's fantastic that so many do (in fact, I find it inspirational!), and it actually seems that career girls get judged just as much as us full-time mums. But where's our choice? Exactly what century are we living in?

The fact is that I have made the decision which is right for me - I LOVE my life! While I will technically be a full-time mum, I've been working for myself since last September. I am a writer, it's what I do - sometimes I'm paid for it, other times I'm not. I simply wasn't cut out for working in an office. In fact, I hated it with a passion and it made me miserable. So, why would I choose to go back to that environment, just to avoid the sneers?

When it boils down to it, it seems that us women are damned if we do, and damned if we don't. But it shouldn't matter whether we choose to work full-time or not - that is our choice, a choice which should be sacred.

So, perhaps you love the idea of leaping right back on to that career ladder and fighting your way in the boardroom. Perhaps you have your own business that you simply can't bear to give up. Or perhaps you simply love the idea of bringing up your child, full-time.

What's wrong with any of those options? Nothing, nada. Each and every single one of us is different, and that's what makes us so fabulous.

Sam x