Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Kids Included - Wedding Wednesday

When I got married, I wanted our children to be included in every part of our special day. You see, I didn't see my marriage as making a declaration just to Steve. Instead, I saw the day as the marriage of our family. The day I officially became stepmother to Olivia and Steve became stepfather to my two sons, Charlie and Max. I even insisted that Steve requested my hand in marriage from my two boys, rather than  my Dad.

In all seriousness, if any of our children did not want us to get married, then I would never have agreed to marry him. If your children are not overly happy about your marriage then work on your family relationship instead of soldiering on with your plans regardless.  I know not everyone will share the same opinion but, for me, my children are a number one priority, not a ruddy wedding.

Originally, we were going to have a civil ceremony. However, I wanted to involve the children in our wedding vows, and this was dismissed by the Registrar.  I was gutted, but I thought of a way around it.  We could make promises in our own written vows to care for one another's children.  And we could have a reading about the importance of family and growing together in harmony.

Thankfully none of that mattered because, after meeting with our local vicar, he agreed to marry us in church.  He liked our idea of involving our children and about us joining together as family during the ceremony.

On the actual day of our wedding, the vicar spoke about the marriage between myself and Steve and referred to our children throughout as they stood by us.  But the biggest surprise to our guests was the idea I had suggested while planning a civil ceremony, which the registrar had abruptly disregarded.  Giving rings to our children.  You see, I didn't want to just give a ring to my new husband, but also to our children. To me, I wanted to signify our declaration as a family, not just as husband and wife.

This is a picture of the vicar blessing the childrens' rings

Our vicar thought it was a wonderful idea and was only too happy to bless the childrens' rings once myself and Steve had exchanged ours.

It was a beautiful, magical moment when the vicar called over a rather nervous Charlie, Olivia and Max and he explained to our wedding guests why we were giving them rings. I placed a very pretty emerald and Swarovski crystal ring on one of Olivia's fingers, while Steve placed a plain silver band on both Max's and Charlie's fingers.

Our three children were proud as punch, and so was I. As I turned around to look at our guests, there were a lot of ladies holding a tissue and dabbing away a few tears.
children at weddings
Even at the reception, I still wanted our children to be an integral part of our day.  I had Charlie, Olivia and Max sat on our table with us during the wedding breakfast, as well as Steve's and my parents.  One big, happy family table.
children wedding speech
This is Max reading out his speech.  I never knew until I saw this photo that Max had embellished the reverse side with our initials for Teresa and Steve. So beautiful.  Charlie, Max and Olivia all wrote a speech and, again, I don't think there was a dry eye in the house as they read them out.  
kids at weddings
I love this pic even though I am pulling THE most weird face as I laugh hysterically.
I was so proud of our children on our wedding day and all the messages wrote in the guest book are all about what a wonderful family wedding day they witnessed; the love which was shown to our children and how our children stole the spotlight.  They really were truly amazing.

bridesmaid wedding
son at wedding
wedding with children
family wedding
Excuse my face on this lovely family pic, I was starting to get face ache from smiling so much.
children involved wedding day
wedding first dance with children

So, you see, there are many ways to make your wedding day extra special by including your children. And take it from me, they will love every single second of it.  Even now, they recall the wedding day as the best family event ever.

Big family wedding Wednesday love,

Teresa x

Please note that all of the above pictures are subject to copyright and are the property of I Am Into This.